“Bumper Karts at Costco”
The emergence of the GIANT MEGA SUPER STORE shopping experience has lowered prices, created gross over buying, and raised the stress of “going shopping” to a level of low-grade combat. Last Saturday I made the mistake of thinking I could “stop by” Costco to pick up a few things. After circling the parking lot twice, MK suggested that we punt. Then a parking spot opened up—a blessing from the parking gods. The inside of the store was more chaotic than the outside.
I loved the midway at the Colorado State Fair. I would head straight for the bumper cars. There was something very satisfying about ramming my yellow bumblebee into the rear end of a guy in a cowboy 🤠 hat, in a red demon, and watching him turn around and growl at me. The experience of “shopping” with hundreds of other folks with their eyes glazed over as they load their carts to overflowing consumer joy, is underwhelming. The childhood lessons of grace and taking turns are erased and replaced with “get out of my way”. In spite of my need to provide comments and instructions to the lady who ran over my toe, I have retreated into the mindset of defensive driver.
I have noticed that one method some shoppers have taken on, is the “glazed over—you are invisible to me” fake . I can spot them every time. My job is to avoid them at risk of a collision. Sometimes I give them my “I know your game” glance. Then, there are the aisle blockers. “Let me see, if I park my cart at an angle while I walk up and down the aisle as I touch everything— no one will notice”.
A few years ago I listened on NPR to a story about a group of scientists studying the “swarming behavior” of animals and insects, as we try to emulate how they move with a fluidity that is nothing short of astounding. Once while we were snorkeling in Cabo, MK and I got in a “ball of sardines”. Imagine tens of thousands of silver fish completely surrounding you. Once I recovered from the surprise, what I experienced was a once in a life time moment with nature. I was swimming with them, and never once did we touch. They also did not touch each other. Who has not marveled at a flock of black birds, flying in a cloud that resembles an amoeba moving through water. Humans have a lot to learn.
Back to Costco—the final gauntlet was the ‘self check out’ line. It went from the front to nearly the back of the store. There we were with our meager purchases, lined up with fellow shoppers, often toting two carts. I secretly love spying on what other people are buying. I then create a story about their life. If there are 20 bottles of wine, I think either ‘dinner party’ or ‘drinking alone’. What does somebody do with 12 tubes of toothpaste?
When I am there, I need to remember that “I am one of them”. I am just a sardine trying to move through the ocean. Back to Cabo. When I got back to the boat I was telling the staff about the sardine swarm. “You might want to know that where there are those sardine balls, there are often sharks”.
I saw no sharks at Costco but there were plenty of barracudas wearing flip flops.
Onward and Upward,
Mark
Lyfting Me Up 